


to no avail

by janetcarter



Category: Babylon 5
Genre: Abandonment, Angst, Other, Telepathy, Vorlons - Freeform, b5 season 4
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:27:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28360899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/janetcarter/pseuds/janetcarter
Summary: Lyta tries to contact the Vorlons beyond the Rim.
Relationships: Lyta Alexander/Kosh
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4





	to no avail

**Author's Note:**

> This had been written for the Fictober prompt "No, come back!" I definitely failed at keeping up this year, but I figured I might as well post this one.

_Are you there?_

_Please, answer me._

_Please._

_Pl e_

_a_

_s_

_e_

_Please, come back._

_I'll be good, I swear. I'm sorry, Kosh._

_I'm sorry._

_I'm_

_s o r r y._

_I ' m ._

_._

_._

"Worthless."

Her mouth whispered on its own, snapping her back to her senses. She blinked a dozen times, both to refocus the vision she'd shut down and to clear away the tears while she was still regaining feeling in her limbs. It was a dark spiral, signaling her thoughts out as far as she'd managed, so rewinding her steps back to reality was a dizzying process. 

Still, it was a wonder she'd managed to stretch herself that far at all, even if…

Even if they didn't answer.

She wondered what would happen if she managed to rent a ship (or steal one, given her current financial struggles) and go to the Rim. If she called out to them, would they answer her like they had when she knocked on their homeworld's door? Or would they pretend no one was home because… because she was no longer of use. They’d had their fun experimenting, and it didn't exactly paint her in the best light to have sided with Sheridan in the war.

But she’d had no choice. Kosh… not her Kosh, but the others… If she thought about what they'd done to her in too much detail her tears would start flowing again, and she wanted to at least be able to wipe them away before that happened. She could wiggle her fingers at least. It was a start, but that was never good enough.

Maybe if she proved she could reach them from here, expand her abilities enough to meet them on her own, they'd finally let her back in.

It was sad, really, to think about too hard, being so alone she'd accept love in such a tainted form. But who could blame her? She'd never known any other kind, and it wasn't like her own species, teep or mundane, were eager to hang around her these days.

The Vorlons were all she had, and that was preferable to the loneliness crushing her chest. There was more for her to do with them. Her powers weren't what they were before. They'd grown, and they were still growing. They'd only continue if she kept trying to contact them. 

Maybe, she thought in desperation, it was a test.

If it was, she was determined not to fail.

So she took a deep breath before her toes even regained feeling, disregarded the little voice in her head telling her there could be consequences to her physical form if she kept this up, and descended back into the dark.

_Is anyone there?_

_Please, answer me._

_Please…_

_I'll prove myself._

_I swear it._

_I'm sorry I'm not worthy yet._

_But I will be._

_I w i l l_

_b_

_e_

_._


End file.
